Eh what kind of ppl I am

I am lost again .. I jz watch a video about ppl wedding and I think I am lost again .. Why I dont have friend like this .. Good or bad
What kind of friend I have ??
Good or bad that I have stable friend that are in middle high class ? That are concern about every action whether will affect personality and pride
Friends that are care about whether if I do this what ppl will think about me

Once upon a time .. Haha actually it's last month or someday while I was viewing video of someone I treated as rival or so call competitor .. Hmm no .. It's jz someone that I concern ab her existing ... And a friend of mine pass by and view together .. Her reaction was ... " wa why this person so 38" this sentence lead me into deep thought .. Yeah why would I even care about someone that really diff from who I am .. (i think i am not 38.. hehe)

Last year .. I was equally care ab someone existence .. And my ex roommate was like " this person ? And blabla bla .." yes ppl in my world is really diff from those ..

So what's the description of ppl that exist in my life ? K I am lost

Hopefully I am not someone that u think is lala , ahlian or maybe 38 .

Thanks for reading to something that I dont think u can comprehend.=)